August 28, 2012

It never felt so good to be unknown!

Let me start by saying that I may have bit off more than I could chew this week and past weekend (or maybe Peter has been dawdling while getting around) because I am tired!

I got a call at 6:30 this morning asking permission to do the 4 vessel arteriogram (or angiogram, I've heard both).  They wanted to make sure that I understood what was going to happen and I told them this was the second one so I felt pretty good about it.  I asked when it was scheduled for and told them I was going to stop by and see her on my way to work.  They said I should have time. 

I got there later than I had planned and her nurse was getting her ready to go (they were going to do the daily CT scan while she was down there).  Gretchen was awake so the nurse pointed at me and asked who this man was that just came in.  Gretchen looked at me, looked back at the nurse and said "I have no clue."  I was about to panic when she broke into the biggest grin I have seen in a long time!  Her voice is still weak and you have to listen closely but she has become quite conversant. 

When I got back there in the afternoon the nurse was in there again and asked the same question.  Gretchen paused a long time and then broke into a bigger grin than she did in the morning.  We all laughed.

They didn't find anything in the scan or arteriogram of Gretchen's brain (just getting her back for this morning).  No new fluid in the brain and no sign of aneurism.  Now we just wait for the MRI to find out the doctors are clueless, I mean don't know what caused it.

The afternoon visit was very good.  I arrived right on time and had a bit of time with Gretchen before her sister brought Peter down.  We talked a bit but I was expecting her to be asleep (that's what she always did before) so I was trying to log in on my computer so I could work.  We would talk a bit and then it would look like she drifted off before she could answer so I would turn around to do something on my computer and she would answer me.  So I would have to come back to the bedside and ask her to repeat herself.  I decided I wasn't going to get any work done so I launched plan B.  I had stuck a Cecilia Bartoli CD in my laptop before I headed out so I started playing it.  For those of you who don't know the history here, Cecilia Bartoli is a famous Mezzo-Soprano.  At the time when we were becoming familiar with her Gretchen's hair was in similar ring curls to Cecilia's so we kidded Gretchen that they were really sisters (Gretchen is also a Mezzo).  Gretchen couldn't remember Cecilia's name so I told her that it is someone that Gretchen sounded a bit like and looked a bit like, to which Gretchen responded "and did I like that?" (I can't believe it, she's lying in a hospital bed looking for flattery).

Given how tired I am these days, God is providing the encouragement that I need right now.  While we were listening, Caro Mio Ben came on.  Gretchen's sister started to sing along and then Gretchen joined in as well (weakly, but she did join in).  Unfortunately, she got the composer wrong (how many of you knew it was Giordani - how many even knew there was a Giordani?).

Almost forgot, Gretchen sat on the edge of the bed today!  When I heard that I told her that before long she'd be walking out of there.

Continue to pray for her recovery but offer up praise for how far she has come in such a short time (well, it feels short when the plans you've made keep getting changed because she keeps improving). 

Pray for me tomorrow.  I have a busy day at the office (have to be in at my normal time unless something bad happens) and probably won't get to spend much time with her tomorrow.

Pray for the people in ICU (both the patients and the families).  It is a hard and lonely place when you don't know if your loved one is going to make it.  Many do not have a saving knowledge of Christ and so they lack the comfort and assurance that I had (and I still battled fear - would that I had Peter's faith, it is as absolute as a child's faith but it seems deeper to me - I have no clue what we did, except pray).